The well wishes are pouring in, including this submission from our esteemed editor, Tall Paul:
There must have been a city-wide blackout in [location redacted] at some point yesterday, because he took 5 minutes out of his day to actually do work for the blog. Thanks, big guy. Feel free to leave your own messages of support in the comments.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Note from the Editor
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Day 6 of being handicapped (or is it fingercapped?)
Work sucks. My fingers are my moneymakers, and I can only use 5 or 6 of them. But I'm getting plenty of sympathy which suits me just fine. I've politely asked my male co-workers not to use the 3rd stall as it is reserved for us handicapped folks. Fadilicious and HP Laserjet have graciously volunteered to patrol the situation to make sure everyone is compliant with my reasonable request. My splint is starting to smell, but not to the extent that anyone has said anything. I can only hope it holds until next Tuesday, but with Lollapalooza this weekend and 90 degree temperatures in the forecast, it might be a rough couple days. I found a chopstick for scratchin', and I really should get back to that. Thanks for all the well wishes and keep em coming.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
More Hand
Went to the doctor today. He walked in the room and exclaimed, "you need surgery." So, I get cut on Tuesday.
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Quote Du Jour
"When a woman has well-defined arms, you know the rest of the package is great." -Doc Beej
Friday, July 25, 2008
Right Handerino Update :-(
Bad news. Went to ER. Finger broken right near the joint. Might need surgery because of the wonky angle at which it bends. Down to typing with one hand. Sigh.
Friday "Things I Don't Care For" Mashup: Politics and Result of Botched Volleyball Play Edition
By now, everyone should know that I am supporting Obama for president. So today, I would like to change things up a bit in the mashup and make it about two things I don't care for very much, thank you. One is the movable object that is likely to be destroyed by the unstoppable force known as Obama in November. And the other relates to my volleyball mishap from yesterday.
John McPain (in my hand)
Enjoy your weekend. Go see Dark Knight if you haven't already. It's well worth it.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
I'm ill-equipped
Today we had our last regular season volleyball game. We won 2-1 thanks to Al's craftiness, sister of Berg's persistence and Pearface's brute strength and in spite of my gaffes, blunders and general lack of effort. On my third mishit of the game the ball struck my right ring finger at an obtuse angle, sending little ringy reeling toward pinky for consolation. For the rest of the game, I became increasingly more useless as ringy blew up like the 4th of July while simultaneously wilting like a thirsty rose.
Luckily for me, my family and friends are chock full of medical professionals to call upon in trying times like these. So I biked home with my left hand, raided the fridge for ice cubes only to find an empty ice tray, and called my dad:
Me: I hurt my finger
Dad: I'm in an Indian restaurant I can't hear you
Me: I hurt my finger (loudly and with emphasis)
Dad: I'm in an Indian restaurant I can't hear you
(WELL I CAN HEAR YOU)
Great. Dead end. Next, a call to the sister. Shit, voicemail. She's on call. Then, a call to future Dr. BJ.
Doc Beej: Put ice on it.
Thanks, tried that. No ice. And no first aid kit to tape/splint it. So, here I sit, typing with one hand with a frozen piece of Tandoori chicken resting on my wounded digit. Pathetic. Any suggestions from you loyal readers? It took me 30 mins to write this and the chickens defrosting. Oh well, at least I have dinner.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
My POS is someone else's POG*
The weather was great this weekend so I took my bike and biked downtown to a friend’s place to watch a movie. I watched the movie, and then after dinner mentally prepared myself for the 2-3 mile ride home. I gingerly walked, and what do I see, but thin air where my bike was supposed to be. The loss was bittersweet and a bit more background is needed to explain that emotion.
My bike is/was (so hard to say that) one of my few possessions--what with my minimalist way of life. The bike served me well, on all my rides to the beach, my rides to the grocery store and to wherever else I wanted to go. It was there when I needed it, never gave me any problems and probably prevented me from gaining a few ounces on the way. It would never abandon me even if I bought a couch it didn't agree with. That was the bitter part.
I bought my bike 4 years ago at that beacon of capitalism- Walmart. I paid $80, yup that’s it. I “protected” it with a $10 lock--more of a red herring than any real protection. Over the past year I have wanted to buy a new bike but the thought of giving this one away was hard, cause let’s face it who would want to buy it. So as has been my life’s strategy, I let fate decide what I should do. To help fate on its way, I rode the bike hard over bumps and in puddles hoping for it to break down. But it did not (For anyone doubting the quality of Walmart’s products look no further).
Tonight, my prayers were answered. A thief stole my bike--he saw through the red herring. He will probably rot in hell, but maybe he was an angel sent to relieve me of my burden. I have to believe it was the latter. Why else would anyone want my beloved POS especially when there was a brand new bike parked 15 feet away from mine.
Anyway a new decision awaits me, should I trade up and get a great (read expensive) bike knowing fully well that this is the third time my bike’s been stolen or should I go back to Walmart (maybe Target… because their business practices are allegedly better)?
Buh bye bike. I don’t even know what your name was.
*POS-Piece of S*** POG-Piece of Gold
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Mazerino the Hero (continued)
I can afford to take cabs everywhere (see proof to the right), but I am a man of the people. So I was riding the northbound 151 on Saturday. To my surprise and delight, I heard "Sylar (chuckle)." Back in C&E's infancy when we were posting on a regular basis and Fadilicious was still sort of a contributor, I wrote this post about how people kept telling me I looked like Sylar from Heroes. One person in particular was a jovial CTA bus driver. When I looked up at my admirer (no homo), I immediately recognized my biggest fan behind the wheel. What are the odds? Here's how the conversation went:
Driver: "You look like Sylar. Anybody ever tell you that?"
Me: "Yea, I know, I remember you"
Driver: laughs and laughs and laughs..."Oh I told you that before? I hear they're coming back"
Because I watch massive amounts of television, I know that Heroes is coming back this fall and it will prominently feature Sylar as the theme this season is "Villains" (Heroes premieres Monday, September 22 at 9/8 central...give me money, NBC).
Me: "Yes, and the theme is Villains."
Driver: "Oh, yea? I'll have to check that out."
At this point, I have nothing more to say, and the bus is crowded. Also, I'm pinned up front by families of idiot tourists who don't know how to move to the back of the bus.
Me: "Crowded bus tonight, eh?"
Driver: "Yep."
Damnit, that didn't work. And just like that exchange, I have no logical conclusion to this post. So, I'll just end things here.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Link of the day
http://rim.jobs (Surprisingly SFW)
Berg gets the assist in finding this one. Not sure how he stumbled upon it. Don't want to know. Enjoy.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
It's just like a mini mall
Sorry for the lack of posts, as usual. It's summer, we're busy at work, we're apartment hunting and a slew of other crappy excuses. To fill the 2 minute void we've left in your day, I'll post this oldie but goodie video that Tall Paul dug up:
While writing this, I just learned from the local news that CTA ridership is up 6% thanks to high gas prices. That's fantastic news for my commute. Also, staycations (and they used that horrible buzzword) are all the rage right now, as evidence by record attendance at the Sears tower skydeck.
Have a good Friday.
Monday, July 7, 2008
VirAl Waris
Wow, the greatest photo you'll ever see is sure making its rounds these days. It's already shown up here and here. In my bid to make Al the next Internet meme, I neglected to take into account his fragile emotional status.
Email from Al:
"2.5 years of sweat and toil and this is what people will remember me by."
That breaks my heart. So, to make amends, I've cracked open the official Camels and Elephants petty cash lock box and taken out an ad at my local gas station. Sorry, Al. I won't post embarrassing pictures of you again:
Except maybe this one:
Edited to add: Without Al's hard work, we wouldn't be the #5 result for a Google search of "super absorbent rags infomercial." Here's to Al.
Sunday, July 6, 2008
As if you still needed reason to support Obama
As you know, we've thrown our significant political muscle behind Obama. Now, John McCain has chosen to fight back against team Camels and Elephants. According to this video, John McCain "hate[s] the bloggers." I'll go ahead and embed it here:
I'll just assume he's talking specifically about Al, Fadilicious and me. I don't appreciate these personal attacks, Mr. McCain. Keep it above the belt, sir. And, I'm pretty sure I know of at least one other blogger who wouldn't appreciate your words either.
--Obamazerin08
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Lollapa-issed Off Even More
I'd like to extend a giant FU to Coldplay. Thanks to their selection of Santogold as their summer tour opening act, she will no longer be performing at Lollapalooza. This news does not make me happy.
And, a second FU for making a single so damn catchy that I can't get the iPod commercial out of my head. I used to rule the world (cue fancy visuals)...crap.
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Hanging loose
I was traveling by the brown line a couple of weeks ago and I overheard people saying the train was crowded. I immediately flashed back to my travel adventures in Mumbai. And I felt like screaming, “Stop complaining you pampered babies!”
It also brought back memories of the multiple times my life has flashed before my eyes on the trains in Mumbai. I traveled by local trains for about 6 years growing up in Mumbai and every day was an adventure. If you wanted a crowded train, the first class compartment in the 8:30 AM express train from Andheri to Churchgate would be the one for you. If you wanted hell or were short on cash, you would venture into the second class (click through for the rest).
I was one of those hangers-on, and on most days I would find a good spot to latch onto. Now why would I risk life and limb and my future gene pool to hang from a train? Well, the temperature inside is close to 120 degrees and the smells of sweat, cologne, oil, food, fish, etc. could be what hell smells and feels like. Bodies squishing against you and people's hands (inadvertently I hope) in your business were par for the course.
So I would hang. On the bad days I would literally be holding on by the tips of my fingers. On one such occasion I was sure I would fall. I prayed as hard as I have ever done in my life, and I’m sure I would wake Him up if he was sleeping. I swore to myself that I would never stand outside the train again. I promised Him my first born kid, then my first paycheck, my second paycheck, anything. By the time the next stop arrived I was up to my 16th paycheck. My weak forearms hurt like hell. But thankfully for me and fortunately for the readers I made it alive.
Come evening, I weighed my choices. I had hell if lost my life given all the promises I had made or hell if I entered the train. I promptly forgot my promises and was hanging outside on my way back at 5:30 PM from Churchgate to Borivali.
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