Tourists suck.
Reason 1: They slow down my commute
I take public transportation to work because I'm a great person. It's an economical and eco-friendly way to get where I'm going, and it's usually pretty speedy as well. Except when a tourist intervenes. Nearly every week on my daily commute down Michigan Avenue, some lost tourist stops the bus, steps onto the first step, thus blocking people who know where they are going from entering, and asks "Is this the bus I take to get to Navy Pier?" No, dimwit. And then they stand there for another minute getting directions from the driver, while I watch the stoplight turn from green to yellow to fucked. Let me spare you the trouble, misguided tourist. Navy Pier sucks. Its sole purpose is to take your hard-earned dollars in exchange for a mediocre time. If you really want to get there, take a cab. Or walk. Something you don't get to do in Ruralia.
Reason 2: They block the sidewalk
Nothing pisses me off more than people who are unaware of their surroundings. On a nice summer day, I like to walk home from work. All too often, I'm trekking down Michigan Ave at a normal to brisk pace when I come upon a family of five walking at a slow to glacial pace five across down the sidewalk. If I say excuse me, I get a blank stare then thirty seconds of comprehension and then movement. This is far from the tourist's most egregious offense though. In fact, Michigan Avenue is a touristy area, so they should be allowed to occupy space at a gingerly pace. What bothers me most is when they douchily decide to take a picture that spans the width of the sidewalk blocking people from getting where they are going. The side of my head must be featured in at least 30 such pictures.
Reason 3: They have terrible taste in food
If you're going to come to my city and irritate the hell out of me, at least make it worth it. Go to the Hancock building and have drinks at the Signature Room. Check out the Lincoln Park Zoo or the Bean in Millennium Park. But most of all try our food. We're known for everything from junk food (pizza, gum and hot dogs) to fine dining (Trotter, Tramonto, Bayless) and I can think of dozens of restaurants in dozens of neighborhoods downtown and around that I'd like to try. So, it pisses me off to walk by a suburbanite ass to suburbanite elbow TGI Friday's mere steps away from Coco Pazzo. Talk to your concierge. Get a reservation at a real restaurant. I would venture to guess that there's a TGI Friday's, Ruby Tuesday's and Nothing To Do Saturday's within 20 minutes of your home.
Edited to add: Please leave comments about why you don't like tourists to visit your fair city in the comment section.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Controversial Statement Tuesday: Only In Town For A Couple Days Edition
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Controversial Statement Tuesday,
Mazerino
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6 comments:
I don't remember Camels & Elephants getting my permission to post my picture! I'll see you in court...
We'll be represented by the brothers Berg. You don't stand a chance.
Sorry, plain jane this is not a case of copyright infringement.
Amount and substantiality
This thumbnail is only 6.3% of the original size based on pixel count. Thus you do not have a prima facie case of infringement and this would be thrown out in summary judgment.
Fair use on the internet
The 9th Circuit Court of Appeals ruled on the 2003 case of Kelly v. Arriba Soft Corporation and found that thumbnails were fair use.
Further, even if this WERE a case of copy write infringement this is governed by the fair use doctrine for the following reasons:
First, it found the purpose of creating the thumbnail images as previews to be sufficiently transformative, noting that they were not meant to be viewed at high resolution like the original artwork was.
Second, the fact that the photographs had already been published diminished the significance of their nature as creative works.
Third, although normally making a "full" replication of a copyrighted work may appear to violate copyright, here it was found to be reasonable and necessary in light of the intended use.
Lastly, the court found that the market for the original photographs would not be substantially diminished by the creation of the thumbnails. To the contrary, the thumbnail searches could increase exposure of the originals
In summary, don't waste Camel Sand Elephant S' time with frivolous lawsuits. Might I remind you that de minimis non curat lex...
-Berg
Legal disclaimer: I am not acting as an attorney and none of the above advice should be taken as legally defensible or actionable.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fair_use#Fair_use_on_the_Internet
http://www.eff.org/cases/kelly-v-arriba-soft
I hate it when they get on the correct bus and then try to pay without correct change. The head of the family (in most cases the woman) asks around for someone to break 20$. No one carries around ten 1$ bills for all your kids asshole.
I'd like to add to the list the following tourist violations:
-Not knowing how to operate the door on the bus and then getting all uppity when the driver passes their stop (hint: push)
-Not moving to the back of the bus or away from the doors on the train to allow more people to get on
-Blocking the sidewalk to watch crappy street performances, notably the silver guy
-Blocking the sidewalk to buy Garrett's Popcorn
-Walking on the bike path by the lake
-Wearing generic clothing with the word "Chicago" on it
-Existing
It bothers me when I'm walking down the street at the "normal to brisk pace" and people, excuse me, tourists, walk out of a store into pedestrian traffic and STOP to have a discussion on whether they should hit up the Disney Store or Niketown.
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