I know most of the news is about the economy and the elections and all the other boring stuff. In the midst of this a very important development is taking place, one that may have repercussions for generations to come.
Breast milk is having a resurgence.
The Chinese tainted milk formula is giving rise to a growing industry of wet nurses. Chinese parents are frantically searching for these nurses to feed their little angels.
Closer home PETA is urging Ben & Jerry's to use human milk. (I have two words for PETA. Eww and Eww.)
Isn’t it the best time to be a lactating woman?
*Hope you didn't miss the pun in the title. Thanks Mazerino
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Keeping abreast of the latest news
Friday, September 12, 2008
Danger Wedding
Not that anyone reads this anymore, and who can blame you. We've been asleep at the wheel:
But, last weekend, we were all in Milwaukee to witness the special union of Danger and his lovely bride:
It was a fun event where we sang, danced, ate Indian food, gave it about 5 minutes as per Al's instructions and danced some more. And of course, we did it all in style. My words can't possibly top the 2nd video, so I'll shut up now:
Mazerino
Al Waris
Fadilicious
Night's end
Thursday, August 28, 2008
My new pride and joy
Check out my new wheels. I found this bad boy unlocked on the street and decided to claim it as my own. If the previous owner needs to find me, I'll be at the scooter party at Delilah's this weekend.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Day 24 of being tactilely challenged
Hello again. It's been almost 2 weeks since surgery, and things seem to be progressing. I'm still stuck in my plaster and gauze post-surgery splint, and, while it's holding up better than its predecessor, it still bugs the hell out of me. It's tight, itchy, and becoming increasingly moist. The 2 fingers I have free are mostly useless because the cast is so bulky. I still shower with a bag over the arm, and work still sucks one-handed, but all is not lost. I've come up with a compelling story about how I was injured while defending 2 at-risk youths from an escaped polar bear at the zoo that gets better every time I tell it. Dr. BJ can attest, and I can't do it justice in this space. But it's a hit among sympathetic women and old people.
Here's a pic of me with my itchin' stick:
And here's one with my shower cap (sponsored by Patagonia who sent this bag in which my Men's Cordwarmer Jacket was placed):
Congrats to Al, Abhinav and India on their gold, and 8x those congrats to Michael Phelps.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Gold.... 112 years later
Indians love gold. We are the world’s largest buyers of gold. However, the Olympic gold has always eluded us especially since it can’t be bought. For a country of a billion plus people, it has been kind of shameful. As of 48 hours ago Michael Phelps had won 8 more individual golds than India ever had. We won the occasional bronze, the rare silver. For the last quarter of a century we had not even won any team golds.
All that changed on Sunday when Abhinav Bindra finally won one for shooting. One gold - still pathetic for a country of a billion plus people but a start nevertheless.
As a counter point, you may think that a poor country like India does not spend enough on sport to make a dent on the world stage. But the amount of money and time and tears spent on cricket dwarfs what most other countries spend on all their sports combined. So that excuse does not hold any water.
Hopefully this win changes the sports structure in India.
Congrats Abhinav!
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Al Waris has failed us all
I'm calling him out for not writing anything in weeks. You suck, Al. I can barely type but at least I post every once in a while. What's your excuse?
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Surgerino update
Hello. Just wanted to let everyone know that the surgery went well. I was zonked out and don't remember much but the doctors tell me I have all 10 digits and a screw in right ringy to keep him in line. The painkillers have just worn off and my finger hurts like hell. But I've been upgraded from my old splint that smelled like 10 homeless men stuck in a boiler room after this weekend at Lollapalooza:
To this one:
I can still happily give the thumbs up which is all my right hand is useful for anyway. Thanks for all the texts, email, phone calls and comments. It's all a bit embarrassing for a single broken finger, but I appreciate them all the same.
Finally, I'd like to use this space to formally announce that I will be retiring from co-ed recreational volleyball effective immediately. My heart's just not in it anymore.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Note from the Editor
The well wishes are pouring in, including this submission from our esteemed editor, Tall Paul:
There must have been a city-wide blackout in [location redacted] at some point yesterday, because he took 5 minutes out of his day to actually do work for the blog. Thanks, big guy. Feel free to leave your own messages of support in the comments.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Day 6 of being handicapped (or is it fingercapped?)
Work sucks. My fingers are my moneymakers, and I can only use 5 or 6 of them. But I'm getting plenty of sympathy which suits me just fine. I've politely asked my male co-workers not to use the 3rd stall as it is reserved for us handicapped folks. Fadilicious and HP Laserjet have graciously volunteered to patrol the situation to make sure everyone is compliant with my reasonable request. My splint is starting to smell, but not to the extent that anyone has said anything. I can only hope it holds until next Tuesday, but with Lollapalooza this weekend and 90 degree temperatures in the forecast, it might be a rough couple days. I found a chopstick for scratchin', and I really should get back to that. Thanks for all the well wishes and keep em coming.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
More Hand
Went to the doctor today. He walked in the room and exclaimed, "you need surgery." So, I get cut on Tuesday.
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Quote Du Jour
"When a woman has well-defined arms, you know the rest of the package is great." -Doc Beej
Friday, July 25, 2008
Right Handerino Update :-(
Bad news. Went to ER. Finger broken right near the joint. Might need surgery because of the wonky angle at which it bends. Down to typing with one hand. Sigh.
Friday "Things I Don't Care For" Mashup: Politics and Result of Botched Volleyball Play Edition
By now, everyone should know that I am supporting Obama for president. So today, I would like to change things up a bit in the mashup and make it about two things I don't care for very much, thank you. One is the movable object that is likely to be destroyed by the unstoppable force known as Obama in November. And the other relates to my volleyball mishap from yesterday.
John McPain (in my hand)
Enjoy your weekend. Go see Dark Knight if you haven't already. It's well worth it.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
I'm ill-equipped
Today we had our last regular season volleyball game. We won 2-1 thanks to Al's craftiness, sister of Berg's persistence and Pearface's brute strength and in spite of my gaffes, blunders and general lack of effort. On my third mishit of the game the ball struck my right ring finger at an obtuse angle, sending little ringy reeling toward pinky for consolation. For the rest of the game, I became increasingly more useless as ringy blew up like the 4th of July while simultaneously wilting like a thirsty rose.
Luckily for me, my family and friends are chock full of medical professionals to call upon in trying times like these. So I biked home with my left hand, raided the fridge for ice cubes only to find an empty ice tray, and called my dad:
Me: I hurt my finger
Dad: I'm in an Indian restaurant I can't hear you
Me: I hurt my finger (loudly and with emphasis)
Dad: I'm in an Indian restaurant I can't hear you
(WELL I CAN HEAR YOU)
Great. Dead end. Next, a call to the sister. Shit, voicemail. She's on call. Then, a call to future Dr. BJ.
Doc Beej: Put ice on it.
Thanks, tried that. No ice. And no first aid kit to tape/splint it. So, here I sit, typing with one hand with a frozen piece of Tandoori chicken resting on my wounded digit. Pathetic. Any suggestions from you loyal readers? It took me 30 mins to write this and the chickens defrosting. Oh well, at least I have dinner.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
My POS is someone else's POG*
The weather was great this weekend so I took my bike and biked downtown to a friend’s place to watch a movie. I watched the movie, and then after dinner mentally prepared myself for the 2-3 mile ride home. I gingerly walked, and what do I see, but thin air where my bike was supposed to be. The loss was bittersweet and a bit more background is needed to explain that emotion.
My bike is/was (so hard to say that) one of my few possessions--what with my minimalist way of life. The bike served me well, on all my rides to the beach, my rides to the grocery store and to wherever else I wanted to go. It was there when I needed it, never gave me any problems and probably prevented me from gaining a few ounces on the way. It would never abandon me even if I bought a couch it didn't agree with. That was the bitter part.
I bought my bike 4 years ago at that beacon of capitalism- Walmart. I paid $80, yup that’s it. I “protected” it with a $10 lock--more of a red herring than any real protection. Over the past year I have wanted to buy a new bike but the thought of giving this one away was hard, cause let’s face it who would want to buy it. So as has been my life’s strategy, I let fate decide what I should do. To help fate on its way, I rode the bike hard over bumps and in puddles hoping for it to break down. But it did not (For anyone doubting the quality of Walmart’s products look no further).
Tonight, my prayers were answered. A thief stole my bike--he saw through the red herring. He will probably rot in hell, but maybe he was an angel sent to relieve me of my burden. I have to believe it was the latter. Why else would anyone want my beloved POS especially when there was a brand new bike parked 15 feet away from mine.
Anyway a new decision awaits me, should I trade up and get a great (read expensive) bike knowing fully well that this is the third time my bike’s been stolen or should I go back to Walmart (maybe Target… because their business practices are allegedly better)?
Buh bye bike. I don’t even know what your name was.
*POS-Piece of S*** POG-Piece of Gold
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Mazerino the Hero (continued)
I can afford to take cabs everywhere (see proof to the right), but I am a man of the people. So I was riding the northbound 151 on Saturday. To my surprise and delight, I heard "Sylar (chuckle)." Back in C&E's infancy when we were posting on a regular basis and Fadilicious was still sort of a contributor, I wrote this post about how people kept telling me I looked like Sylar from Heroes. One person in particular was a jovial CTA bus driver. When I looked up at my admirer (no homo), I immediately recognized my biggest fan behind the wheel. What are the odds? Here's how the conversation went:
Driver: "You look like Sylar. Anybody ever tell you that?"
Me: "Yea, I know, I remember you"
Driver: laughs and laughs and laughs..."Oh I told you that before? I hear they're coming back"
Because I watch massive amounts of television, I know that Heroes is coming back this fall and it will prominently feature Sylar as the theme this season is "Villains" (Heroes premieres Monday, September 22 at 9/8 central...give me money, NBC).
Me: "Yes, and the theme is Villains."
Driver: "Oh, yea? I'll have to check that out."
At this point, I have nothing more to say, and the bus is crowded. Also, I'm pinned up front by families of idiot tourists who don't know how to move to the back of the bus.
Me: "Crowded bus tonight, eh?"
Driver: "Yep."
Damnit, that didn't work. And just like that exchange, I have no logical conclusion to this post. So, I'll just end things here.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Link of the day
http://rim.jobs (Surprisingly SFW)
Berg gets the assist in finding this one. Not sure how he stumbled upon it. Don't want to know. Enjoy.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
It's just like a mini mall
Sorry for the lack of posts, as usual. It's summer, we're busy at work, we're apartment hunting and a slew of other crappy excuses. To fill the 2 minute void we've left in your day, I'll post this oldie but goodie video that Tall Paul dug up:
While writing this, I just learned from the local news that CTA ridership is up 6% thanks to high gas prices. That's fantastic news for my commute. Also, staycations (and they used that horrible buzzword) are all the rage right now, as evidence by record attendance at the Sears tower skydeck.
Have a good Friday.
Monday, July 7, 2008
VirAl Waris
Wow, the greatest photo you'll ever see is sure making its rounds these days. It's already shown up here and here. In my bid to make Al the next Internet meme, I neglected to take into account his fragile emotional status.
Email from Al:
"2.5 years of sweat and toil and this is what people will remember me by."
That breaks my heart. So, to make amends, I've cracked open the official Camels and Elephants petty cash lock box and taken out an ad at my local gas station. Sorry, Al. I won't post embarrassing pictures of you again:
Except maybe this one:
Edited to add: Without Al's hard work, we wouldn't be the #5 result for a Google search of "super absorbent rags infomercial." Here's to Al.
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